The Omani Columunists’ Fate!

Websites – www.majidall.com and www.majidwrite.com

 New www.mymajidwrite.com

 Columnist A Columnist B

Images – Columnists – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

For Sunday September 29th 2013

 Between Us Only!

The Omani Columnists Fate!

  • I have given you good advice; but you like not good advisers – Prophet Saleh RA 7:73 – 79
  • I am thankful for all those difficult people in my life; they have shown me exactly who I do not want to be – Anon
  • If some of the Officials were to be at the Pearly Gates; simply no one will enter into heaven – My Late Father

This week I was very sad and disheartened in reading this column – in the other newspaper – of a famous Omani Lady Columnist from Salalah – who had decided to stop continuing with her column. She does not give explicit and clear reasons for ending the column – but one can be forgiven by reading between the lines – that it was more of her decision to do so! I can associate with her feelings – having gone through the motions myself before!

This lady I admire her very much by being able to handle taboo subjects – especially from an angle of a woman – where in the conservativeness and inward looking at things – it is expected (required?) for the woman to go to a corner – and shut up! The poor ladies in another place are ‘still not allowed to drive’ – and if they do – their ‘guardians’ are charged hefty fines for allowing people under their control – to ‘drive without licenses’!

Even though the young dynamic Emir of Qatar in his UN Speech had said – It is clear that things will not revert (to the old ways of doing things) in the Arab world and that the Arab peoples have now become more aware of their rights and are more involved in the public domain.

It is true that there are many people – including Omanis for that matter – that would prefer that there are no Omani Columnists that especially write in English – though I would imagine that there would be more time and compassion – for those that write in Arabic!

The problem is that in the many cases and in many of the English Newspapers especially here – you may find The Top Management being run by The Locals themselves – but the many of the Editorial and Media Staff are Expatriates! Trust me in saying that many of them they really do have more time, patience and support for the local writers – in many cases anyway! But there are still a group of the die-hards Old Guards that are determined to bring our lots down – and not even to be outdone.

Columist 1

With due respects and apologies – this is the sad and bitter truth. Even if some may deny and do not want to accept this! Woe to you if they are in control – or have ‘the ears of the top (local) bosses’ – and that they are very good Actors, Impersonators and Impressionists. Schemers and Plotters! They also have long elephant memories – and do not ever forget – or forgive easily. Once you have crossed them – you are doomed for life!

Even if Ghandi himself had said – The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong – Mahatma GhandiFew of them listen to him.  Even Dr. Abdul Kalaam – It is very easy to defeat someone, but it is very hard to win someone! And Shakespeare too – Never play with the feelings of others because you may win the game but the risk is that you will surely lose the person for a life time!

Columnist 5

 Bite the hand that feeds you – and then end to lick the boot that kicks you! – Anon

Columnist 2  Columnist 4

Images – Columnists – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

People need to realise that things have now changed with the advent of time and development – and in Change! Change – before Changes change you! The old games and gimmicks do not work anymore. Personally, I do feel that those in The Senior Positions in The Media too need to change with The Times – and sitting back in the offices whilst the expatriates under them do all the works – and they then take credit and control – need to change too – and very fast too!

Columnist 3

There is simply no time for ‘foot dragging’ – and in not in giving more chances and opportunities to the younger ones – especially those that have the Media qualifications and knowledge – even if not that much experience and exposures. Even The Expert Expatriate had made many mistakes – before he became now capable and competent. If the chances and breaks were given to them before – why not to our own too?

As a Writer and Columnist too – I have met many people who like what I write! But there are some elements – some powerful too – that wish for the dirt to be pushed under the carpet – or as some of them say to me – ‘not to wash our dirty linen’ in public! Especially as you write in English! Even if in writing the payments are just peanuts – or as it is said – that there is simply no money in writing! As Jules Renard had said – Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money!

For me personally, I am very happy to see so many youngsters coming up to in writing columns – especially in English! They should be encouraged and be supported! Like I had told The Editor – Anytime that you have found a good writer cum columnist – and have no space for more – just let me know to quit gracefully – whilst still being read and respected. One of The Young Columnist – whom I am seeing doing very well – has even called me The Guru – because of my support to him in the past!

We need to be more open and flexible – and more receptive! We owe this to the younger generation – to our future, destiny and legacy. History will judge us unkindly and mercilessly – if we do not come to do of that is required and expected for to do and perform! Time is of the essence too! No time to waste here!

And Yes – Those like us that still like to ‘open our mouth and speak’? Let us! You never know! One day we may have nothing more to say! Or may have said it already!

Take Care!

By: Majid Al-Suleimany

Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own. Carol Burnett

The Beauty of Oman!

Oman – The Beacon To The World!

The Beauty of Oman!

A Simpler Way To Explain Things

Or Why I Like Our Omani Foreign Policies!

!Our Omani Flag HM SpeechOman?s Sultan Qaboos bin Said salutes duHM Sultan Qaboos bin Said 3

The Omani Flag & HM Sultan Qaboos bin Said

Some time back I was stuck in a traffic jam with my then American CEO – and we saw these two Diplomatic Delegations pass in front of us in the traffic queue. So he turned to me and asked – Do you know who is visiting? And teasingly he remarked – I am sure Oman is arranging on the sidelines – quietly and diplomatically – for these two to meet – as they hardly ever talk to each other – even through intermediaries. Next day we found in the papers that his information was correct – and about the delegations. A few months later there was a big coverage press release news of some people arrested of being released – and their journey to their homeland passing through Oman! His casual remark that it was only Oman that can do such miracle acts came to pass and in reality!

When I was working in one of the GCC countries, I had met many locals there who had confided to me that ‘they have a lot of time and respects’ for us in Oman – and how we do conduct our businesses – especially in Foreign Affairs! Dual respects and non intervention in others internal affairs – and remaining International Compliance in Foreign Affairs!

In my job aspects there – I had met many expatriates ex Oman working – and though some of them were receiving very high packages, benefits and perks that they possibly could not get in Oman – I know because I was in HR! One of the most fundamental thing that they missed the most were ‘the Omanis’ – and how hospitable, kind, respecting and esteeming they were to the ‘invited guests’ to the country – and nothing in comparison – even to those near us!

In my first article in my first book – I had written of how I got my first job in one of the GCC countries. As I was being interviewed for the job – the CEO barged in asking some questions to the Recruiting Panel. He saw me in my Omani attire – and was asking if it was about the HR job. When they replied affirmatively – he said Stop the Interview now.

Used to hearing bad news all the time – I imagined the worst – and was starting to get angry. The panel came back to me to say – Congratulations! You got the job. The CEO does not want any further interviewing of you to continue. It seemed that the CEO was visiting Salalah – got lost and he approached a local Bedouin family in the Interior who were just about to have lunch. They insisted for them to have lunch together with them. Only then they took them to the highway – and after a few kilometers showed them the way to Salalah.

It gnawed deeply on the mind of The CEO – what he could do to repay this kind gesture of hospitality and gesture. Luckily for me I was in my Omani attire – and the presentation of self for the interview as such – worked greatly in my favour – and had also quenched the desire of the CEO for ‘pay back’ – and as best as he could. There was a candidate there from another Arab country – who was more qualified and educated than me – and would have most possibly have got the job – if the CEO had not intervened! I was told this by the Panel – and begging me ‘not to tell the CEO!

Omani Faces - Toyota

Omani Images – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

In one of the lifts in the place – there was this European lady who had dropped her files as she was rushing to the lift! As I was bending to help her – my peers were sarcastically remarking things – when the woman turned facing them – and replying in impleccable Arabic – that it shows in his attire – which looks a bit different! Then she remarked very nice things about Oman. I am not sure if she got what she was looking for in her planned presentation – but it would surprise me if she did not!

In Waterloo Railway Station in UK – I heard my name being called out! I was wondering to myself who is it that knows me here? And then an old work colleague – a British guy – introduced himself. He insisted to take me home for dinner – but I resisted. He too missed Oman very much. He said to me – I went to many countries after Oman – but frankly and honestly – Oman was the best place we had really enjoyed staying with! Our best time was spent there!

When my wife joined me in UK – we went to the countryside in UK. Our banger Morris Minor 1300 got stuck in one of the mud puddles. I was contemplating to call the AAA when this kind farmer came with his tractor and pulled me out! When I was thanking him profusely – he asked me where I came from – after me telling him and his seeing that I was a ‘foreign student’! When I told him from Oman – he refused to let me go till we had some tea and scones in his farm house. He worked in the Oman army before as an Instructor!

I – as an Omani loyal citizen – was very proud of His Majesty visit to Iran. At a time when all the Arab states had boycotted Anwar Sadat – Oman was the few countries that had stood out for talking and diplomacy as the way to solve our worldly problems – especially in relations between countries. From the Renaissance to this very day – and to future – Oman will remain as the beacon and the torch bearer as the best example and illustration of ‘quiet working diplomacy’ – and the correct ethical way of solving world’s problems.

Use of threats, boycotts and the language of wars only makes a bad situation turn even worse – as many examples of history! It is said – If the lessons of history teach us anything it is that nobody learns the lessons that history teach us!

May Allah Protect and Preserve our beloved Nation – and Give His Majesty Long Life and Health – Amin.

 BOmani MenOmani WomanMale Omani at the goat market in Nizwa , OmanOmani Young GirlOmani Boys

Omani Images – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

Article By – Majid Al Suleimany

A Letter To My Heart! – By Majid Al Suleimany

 Majid A B-Majid-New-Photo-245x300[1]

September 18, 2013

A Letter To My Heart! – By Majid Al Suleimany

Dear heart, there is something I must tell you
Something sad and so hard for me to say
For I know how much you always loved her
And how you always hoped that she’d come back someday

But day after day my hopes grow dimmer
As I watched life and love passing me by
And the life I live is empty and so lonely
But you just lived for her and slowly let me die

…. Lyrics – Letter To My Heart – Jim Reeves.

https://myshorttakes.com/2014/05/31/a-letter-to-my-heart-previous-between-us-only/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vA3_IXNxv7E

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB1FPaPbduM

Day before yesterday evening (Monday September 16, 2013) I had cut my left palm – just a little bit – with a sharp knife whilst cutting some oranges! The scare and shock was more for me to see so much blood coming out from my hand! But that was not alone and enough – I just attended to myself using the First Aid experiences I knew – till the blood had stopped spurted out! Only then I told the members of my family! Funnily, I did not want to disturb anyone – and let the family members at the house continue doing whatever they were doing uninterrupted – whilst I dealt with my case on my own.

After the blood had considerably stopped – I then told them – showing them the bloodied tissues! My daughter in law T then applied plaster and bandage – and the blood then stopped completely!

It is not a question of making mountains out of molehills – but I was wondering to myself why I did all these things on my own – rather than involving my family? Frankly – I did not want to disturb them – and I remember a late very good friend of mine who had cautioned me – M? You may be surrounded by a lot of family and others – but yet be the loneliest person on the face of the earth – and suffer alone and in silence. This poor man had died later on since early morning by a heart attack – but his wife and family were away – and it was only late evening when the houseboy came home to find that ‘boss had died’! The medical certification had confirmed that the man had actually died that early morning!

In my Columns and Books I wrote about my late father who had Parkinson – and also hearing problems because of his age being over 88. My late father did not like wearing hearing aids – because he said it made him ‘feel uncomfortable’! So it was difficult to communicate with him indeed! You had to shout and scream – and soon one by one ‘gave up’ on him!

The poor man – he used to see all people around him – children and grandchildren – having a field day – talking to each other in fun and merriment – whilst he sat on the chair – all alone – sad, desolate and unhappy! Few times I noticed sad tears coming from his eyes – especially when I sat near him – trying to talk to him – or at least not make him feel alone and miserable!

After all the sacrifices and things he did for his family! If you have read my books – especially The Between Us Only Series – www.myownmajid.com – you will so many stories about my late dad – Peace Be Upon Him! Also on my Late Mother – Peace Be Upon Her – Amin Amen for both!

I have always heard the expression – what goes around – comes around! Maybe it is my turn now to experience what my late dad had experienced? Because I too made many sacrifices for my family! Same stories here at www.myownmajid.com

Personally I had volunteered to go for early retirement in 1998 – and full one in 2008. But my wife – who is 2 years younger than me – is still working – and still wants to work! All her life – hobbies, mechanisms and existence per se – is built on ‘continuing to work in that Big Oil Company – BOC – and her world is surrounded by this more than anything else – that includes me too in the equation.

Like I had said before – it is not my intention to make mountains out of molehills – but I am a sick ailing man now – and even typing this makes me cry – remembering my late Father too! It also reminds me of my friend’s advice – surrounded by so many people – but yet all alone too! I suffer from acute diabetes – I have eyes problems in glaucoma, myopia and eyes pressures! And yes another thing – I put the eyes medicines myself – by looking at the mirror whilst doing this! My last housemaid Mary – Filipino – used to do this to me before – but she left 15 years ago! The rest feel squeamish to ‘perform such an act’!

I have noticed lately that I have developed a very bad temper and tantrums – because I am carrying ‘too much baggage’  still with me!  Excess Baggage! I still remember with bitterness and anger how my career life was ‘screwed up’ by me speaking my mind – and calling a spade as a spade! And how people worked together and conspired to bring my Management Consultancy down – by false promises, betrayals, double dealings and stab-in-the-backs! My websites, books and columns are full of these stories too!

The East Africans say also – The thing that bites you comes from your own dress! When the European Expatriates ran the show – things were not so bad – and until our very own came in – and they had long and elephant memories! Please read this article for more on what I am saying all about here! http://majidsn.com/as-to-why-i-had-left-my-last-oil-company-loc/   Also in my book – The Sequel – Three – Between Us Only! www.myown-ebooks.com

And actual in not wanting things to go bad as my focus and aims in my life! That is my BIG PROBLEM – being honest, sincere, genuine – and forthcoming in life! My 2nd Arab Management book – A Cry For Help! – I wished those VIPs I sent them Complimentary Copies had read it! My book website at www.myown-majid.com  It was written BEFORE the Arab Spring Uprisings – and with all the cautionary calls, advices and counsels inside – as a Human Resources Management Consultant Expert and Advisor!

Yes on another thing! I am a Writer and Columnist too! I meet many who like what I write! But there are some elements – some powerful too – that wish for the dirt to be pushed under the carpet – or as some of them say – ‘not to wash our dirty linen’ in public! They too have a field day to make misery and havoc to me – even if the payments are peanuts – or there is simply no money in books! As Jules Renard had said – Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money!

All my life I have been a quiet peaceful type of guy! I have always avoided confrontations – even if thrown at me! That is my second big problem – I try so much to avoid confrontation and fights – some people take this for me being weak and impotent! That is not the real case – even if I will be speaking my mind – and in making a stand!

When I feel that the situation has crossed Red Lines – despite my earlier cautions, warnings and ‘stay-away’ – I come charging in – like a bull in a glassware shop! My ‘negative reactions’ – gives chances and opportunities for those vicious and unscrupulous people – to use this more against me! That only enrages and makes me more mad – adding fuel to the fire! And some people are always on a ‘win win’ situation – so they take more advantage, credit and benefit from this – whether by design, default or inadvertently.

I am now a 65 years old person – sick and ailing too! Bad mixtures, chemistry and abrasiveness just makes me more worse! It brings out the worst in me – in the very things I desperately try to avoid and keep away. Some people are good Actors and Pretenders – and it is an uphill fight for me to remain at par! I have always strived and aimed to be a nice, good and decent person – with care and feelings for everyone! I believe in Live and Let Live too – and one should not be too quick to judge – or condemn! And knowing the famous adage – The one wearing the shoe knows where it pinches!

There are many other things I want to say too – but cannot because I do not want to hurt others – or shift blame and attention to them! Besides – this is a public forum!

If you know now why I am an angry person – I guess by now you will know why!

With Sincere and Due Apologies.

 Majid Al Suleimany

Muscat – Sultanate of Oman

September 18, 2013

The Marriage Proposal!

 

 The Marriage Proposal!

Proposal B

For Wednesday September 18th 2013

 Between Us Only!

The Marriage Proposal!

Or From The Pampers To The Wedding Dress!

If friendship is your weakest point then you are the strongest person in the world – Abraham Lincoln

There is something quite definite about our (late) parents that though they are not that highly educated – but they are more smart, intelligent and wiser than what we are – and ever hope to be in life! As time goes by – the graph will only take a more dip downwards than the status quo!

Long time ago – when I was showing the plot and drawings of my villa in Qorum Heights – the small villa but with the big heart – my late father was lamenting that he does not see a spare bedroom in the sketch! So I asked him – what for dad? You mean for the guests? No – he sadly lamented – just in case for one of your daughters – if she decides to return home!

Marriage Prop AProposal C

Images – The Wedding Propsal  – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

Though they are not really for us – to be with us forever – still the daughters are our responsibilities – even after long they have got married – and have children too! Then I recalled the incidents when my late sister used to come back home – and nobody had asked her anything – until she was cooler and calmer – and now was ready and wanted to talk! A few days she herself would return to her husband – on her own too!

One of my friends and peer at work at one time had invited me to the coming wedding of his son. As we sat talking – he was lamenting to me that if you do not learn from others experiences – then God will teach you instead! So I could see the man was highly stringed and troubled – and wanted to talk! So I prompted and encouraged him to go on and to do so!

So the poor man broke down – and he narrated to me that his son was going to get married to an offspring that came out of two groupings of people that – putting it rather mildly – he was ‘not too keen with’!  That is God’s mysterious ways of giving you Life’s Teachings! The man used to boast to me how in his job pursuits he used to make ‘special attention’ to these two groups – and where it would go on okay with anyone else – but with the exception of them!

Proposal D

Images – The Wedding Propsal  – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

A great sign of great leadership is seeing something with your own eyes – and you acting upon it immediately afterwards. It is said that the Great Prophet PBUH was passing one day – and he heard a woman singing sadly  to herself that she was ‘missing her husband’ – who had gone off to the wars then!  So a rotation system was introduced instead – to bring some of the men back home!

This happened to me too this week! I was outside the housemaid room – and I thought I heard crying! So next morning – as diplomatically and tactfully that I could muster – I asked her – what gives! Bear with me for awhile – but it will be clear at the end of this article – as to why the poor lady was crying too!

Anyway – this week I had received a ‘high powered’ delegation coming to ask for ‘the hand of my last daughter! Like any other father – I was torn between seeing her go away from the home – and seeing that my daughter was moving on with her life – and after starting work on completion of her Engineering Degree in the UK! For a girl to take such a field – and to be able to work in the desert locations – is in itself a great example and demonstration how far ahead and developed Oman has become now!

With people reporting to her – who were all ‘born and bred’ males – but modernity had caught up with us! As a person in HR – I recall many incidents of the so-called ‘stout and strong minded real men’ – who had refused to formally report to the fairer sex – until and unless the ‘books were thrown’ at them! Those were our old ways – we now have even their Excellencies the Ministers too!

They say the world is a small place – because you never know whom you will meet later in life – or need from that someone! Even if you think that you are rich and powerful – and ‘nothing can ever touch you’ – as in the last week’s article – The Sealed Fates in Life! You may think someone is insignificant and unimportant – and then you are forced to eat your own words – whether by mitigating circumstances and or by nature itself! Whether you like it or not – because events and fate have caught up with you now – and you are just helpless and impotent!

So I had a long chat with the Filipino housemaid. Then she told me – Oh Pappa – I came to Oman when MM was only one year old – today she has blossomed to be a fully fledged woman (girl) – and getting married too! From changing her pampers – to now assist her in wearing a bridal dress! How time flies – she sadly lamented! You know Pappa? Your above article last week made me think a lot – like many of your articles do!

My late father used to watch his grandchildren – and great grandchildren play! He used to ask us – Do you think they will remember and know each other (in the future)? So I used to tease back – Of course they will! You must be joking – my father sarcastically hit back – if even their parents ‘do not know each other now’ – how do you expect their children – and grandchildren – to remember! My later father never minced his words – calling ‘a spade a spade’!

I wished the old man was around – because he would see his granddaughter getting married now – and I will be keeping the room for her – just as he had advised! Though I am trying hard to resist in the temptation to convert it into an office – because I now use the dining room as also an office – books take a lot of the space – and the ‘friction cause and strife’ with Great Madam Wife – GMW – especially when guests are invited! Just gathering storm clouds – and for more storms coming ahead – unless I can get some money quickly now – for a much needed break! I have never been on a holiday break for the last 5 years!

My granddaughter was then saying to us – so Aunty MM is getting married now? Soon she will have babies – and what will they call me? We just look at her in ‘shock and awe’ – especially seeing she is just 5! Who is teaching them these things? Where do they learn such things? The mind just boggles….!

Gets scarier and scarier – by the day!

Take Care!

By: Majid Al-Suleimany

The ‘Sealed Fates’ in Life!

The ‘Sealed Fates’ In Life!

Workers 1

For Sunday September 15th 2013

Between Us Only!

The ‘Sealed Fates’ in Life!

After more than 10 years from the last time I had visited – this week I had the pleasure and the privilege to visit again The Oman Daily Observer Offices and meet some of my new and the usual old friends there!

In my first visit I was being interviewed for the start of the ‘infamous’ Between Us Only! column. It is a wonder and strange thing to notice that many of the people we meet nowadays seem to have so aged – and so tired and forlorn – as if they have learnt to ‘give up and just accept their fate’ – and that there is simply nothing that they can do now to look at things anew and afresh – change their path – but to go on as before! Nothing has changed that much! Human nature and habits are just like that – and nothing has gone amiss!

Workers 2

Images Workers – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

I look at the newspaper delivery boy. I ask him how many years he has been doing the same job – day in and day out – and whether he has any other plans for his remaining days on earth – and he retorts – sadly and sarcastically – what else can I do but sell newspapers? He continues – Even I had to learn how to drive a motorcycle first before I could do the job! I have had my hands broken twice by a car hitting me from behind – because the way people drive – they just cannot accept a motor cycle to occupy the ‘space of a car’ in front of them! So the many cases when he had to pull sharply right – for safety’s sake!

I had my hair cut at the saloon. Here is another profession. All he knows is to cut hair – since a young man at 16. 30 years later he is still cutting hair – but not in his country – but in a different country! Even here he has to fight to keep his job – with constant checks and inspections. Yet they still want the jobs for their own young men – but there are no takers! Though you would think that people would be happy that there is someone out there that is ‘willing and keen’ to do the job even! The same case for the sandwich (shawarma) boy! The drivers – especially the heavy duty ones! The mechanics! The Municipality cleaners! You name it!

But it is not only the expatriates – it is the locals too! The same clerks, PROs, the secretaries, the bank staff, the drilling jobs, the stewards and stewardess, the airline crews – you name it! Not all of them can get ‘lucky breaks’ in life – like the admin clerk I know who looked that smart, intelligent and promising – and picked out to go for an academic course overseas – takes engineering – and becomes an Engineering Director! Those he left have also moved forward – but the luckier ones to an officer or supervisor level at the most! Suppose the said clerk had refused to go for the course – would he have remained in the same lots – or would still fate tempt him to a faster lane – in another route? Your guess is as good as mine!

Workers 3

Images Workers – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

My Literature Teacher in Secondary School in Tanzania – that pretty Miss F – then and probably is still – told me – M – Life is like a drama. You are given a role in it – and all you can do is play your role well! She had a thing for me – she liked me a lot! Years later after I had left the place – she had returned back home to Goa India! I was just wondering out loud what she would be doing back at returning home – even if married now – if not only as a Teacher?

I had then a working peer sitting opposite me in the oil company. Every pay day he would come to my office and lament – this salary is just not enough! Smart I would retort – Be thankful – there are people out there receiving far less in life – and some not at all. He even suggested we go into business together – but the idea of business just scared me then!

I should have stayed with my gut feelings – and had never gone into business – and end going bust! But my friend made it – he became rich and successful! Those he left behind? Of course they moved up too – 2 or 3 job levels up! The great man has even offered jobs to the same peoples – even those who were ‘more senior to him’ at the job front!

What do you say to the ‘bus driver’ who has ended up to be a President of a country – after entering politics? Or the boat man? Or Great Late Margaret Thatcher – drawing attention to herself – ‘that she was just a shopkeeper’s daughter’!

Yet still – in one of my local flights in that distant place – I had met the ex President – no longer in high position – though there were 1 or 2 people ‘still looking after him’. Maybe I was staring at him too much – so he smiled and came over to me! Believe me – him coming to me? I think I was bumbling and getting confused – because this was the same ‘personality’ that we stood on the road sides cheering as his motorcade went past! Now we were in the same flight – all the seats were economy class! So many cases like him – no longer in high offices of power! Simple people back again!

The other day in the Masjid I went to greet this great ex high profile personality – now just a simple person!. So I said to him – I guess you will not remember me? But you had given our family a good and great picnic meal one time! I tried to remind him. The good tired forlorn man looked at me with sad eyes – You remember a meal? I did greater things to others – they do not even bother to even speak to me – let alone come and greet me like you did. So I should say Thank You – Not you!

As the Brits say – that is how the cookie crumbles! Or the great words of Miss F – and there is nothing more that you can do about it! You are telling me? Remember me? I did try – but sometimes you just have to accept that ‘your fate is sealed in life’ – if even moving to writing as a substitute – can be called that too!

Take Care!

By: Majid Al-Suleimany

Date – September 13th 2013

Your views most welcome!

My New Book – Wipe My Tears!

About The Book – Briefly!

• I read your article – it made me cry! I gave it to the wife – and she too cried with me! – Indian CEO.
• Real visionary and with great realistic foresight – American CEO.
• The article was a great eye-opener for me! – British CEO.
• Great experiences, ideas and thoughts! – Senior Public Official!
• My heart just broke out – and I cried out loud! – Omani Lady Fan

This is the Author’s 10th book – and book 6 in the Between Us Only! series. The book follows up on the success of the previous books and furthers the idea of private talks between friends on matters that many are too scared to touch!

Often times delving into sensitive critical topics that aren’t always sweet, this enlightening book uses a clear and elegant prose to explore social evils in the society as well as their light hearted counterparts.

Covering a variety of priceless topics, this wonderful collection of articles gives readers everywhere a glimpse into the issues that are prevalent in today’s society.

Although the book is based mainly on Oman and The GCC, many of the topics are of universal application and appeal – with the increasing lack of tolerance, radicalization and fundamentalism in society.

The book also carries many family, offices and human based articles that are applicable to us all – as bottom line we are the same human being in that same a person – with the same needs, wants and fears – devoid of race, religion, creed and color! Many of the articles are highly emotive and heart rendering – and that is the reason of adopting the title of Wipe My Tears!

Majid Al Suleimany has over twenty-five years of experience as a human resources specialist and over ten years of experience as a management and human resources consultant, expert, and advisor. For the past ten years, he has written weekly columns in The Oman Daily Observer, an English daily, which has led to five published books based off of his columns. Al Suleimany has also published two other books on Arab management – http://www.myown-ebooks.com and one on Road Safety Awareness – http://www.bethesafedriver.com

Front Wipe My Tears

http://www.myownmajid.com

To Order Directly – http://www.createspace.com/4304972

My Other Books

The Sequel – Three – http://www.createspace.com/4153263
Short Takes 2 – http://www.createspace.com/4153269
Being The Safe Driver! Behind The Wheel! – http://www.createspace.com/4097374

The Arab Management Book that won The USA Golden Literary Excellency Award 2013

Psychology of Arab Management Thinking! http://www.trafford.com/08-0889

More details and information at my http://www.myownmajid.com

Regards,

Majid Al Suleimany

The Sob Stories!

 

Websites – www.majidall.com and www.majidwrite.com

For Wednesday September 11th 2013

Between Us Only!

The ‘Sob Stories’!

A growing trend that too needs to be nipped in the bud!

  • Whoever abstains from asking others for some financial help, Allah will give him and save him from asking others, Allah will make him self-sufficient – Al Bukhari
  • Abu Huraira related that the Prophet had said: He who makes a habit of asking from others reaches out for a brand of Fire, so let him refrain or continue, as he desires – Muslim.
  • Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day – Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a life time – Chinese Saying.

Sob 1Sob 3

Images Sob – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

In one of my earlier articles a few years ago – I wrote about this incident that had happened to us in the family after returning to the place we had left – and after the Zanzibar Revolution. Our uncle had been hosting us in his house to stay – which originally was our own house before – arriving there broke and penniless! Food was an issue due to depleted funds – and in one of the meals I had casually remarked – being a novice young boy without thinking properly – that I had enjoyed the food as being half hungry!

My late father was visibly upset in ‘forgetting myself and in embarrassing the family per se’! He sadly lamented to me – we come from a proud stock  and branch – and we do not stoop low or degrade ourselves in front of others – even if excusably that we are hungry and in need! Keep your head high – and these are tests from God – and we will overcome – and win!

Remember this always – my son! And that was my late father’s outlook and philosophy – though he rode the same donkey in Oman to school with others that later came to be very high VIPs! He had never in his life approached them for anything – and even if they had asked him if we needed anything – he would reply strongly steadfastly that ‘we were okay – thank you for asking!’

Sob Asob 2

Images Sob – For Demonstration Purposes Only!

One time at a shopping complex, I saw this old banger type of car – which speaks volumes of the expatriate driver of the car – he half clutched and abruptly started off the car – when he saw me approaching him! I followed him to the flat he was staying – and asked him why did you do that? His response was – I thought you were coming to beg some money from me ‘with a sob’ story – like many I have met at this place! So I told him off – all I wanted to tell you was you had your full lights beam on – being day time anyway! As he was apologising profusely – I decided to leave him – before I gave him ‘a real piece of my mind’! That is how low we the locals have stooped on – to vet such treatment – even from peoples that ‘have millions of beggars’ back at home!

During the month of Ramadhan we had women with children tailing behind them with all kinds of sob stories. The new trend is from Syria – but what boggles the mind is how they have entered the country – if they were real and genuine cases! It reminds me of the Arabic comedy scene of (Professor) Ghawar – asking the border police in the scene – why he was ‘not asking the goats’ crossing the border ‘for their passports’?

A friend of mine was telling me of one particular lady who had a difficult misbehaving son – who was causing her tremendous woe and troubles by his behaviours – even to his wife and children. The boy was terminated jobless with the same crude behaviour and attitudes at work! His wife had left him – taking the children with her. The poor mother was suffering terribly and a lot – mothers being mothers! Even if she knew deep down about her son! The poor lady was going from house to house to collect money to pay for the escapades of his son – perhaps even drugs related too!

Believe me, I am a softie for such sob stories – and I am caught many times that too late I have been scammed and duped – and have been fooled again! I asked a Religious Person once – he said to me – if you have the money and you want to help – just do it. You are not responsible for ‘the sins that the person is getting for hoodwinking others’ – that is not your responsibilities – but his alone! Some of them have even x-rays of why ‘they are disabled, invalid and incapacitated! Unless you are in the Medical profession – you just have to believe what you see!

When we came back to Oman in the early 1970s – this trend was not there – and even in isolated cases if there were – it was very tiny and minute – not like now ‘where is the fashion and trend – of getting fast and easy money from gullible and unsuspecting lots. And even if they were a bit suspicious – they still give for peace and conveniences – and seeing the ‘poor children’s eyes of desperation and need’!

What makes me worry a lot and be concerned – is perhaps we are ‘turning away real and genuine’ cases of need and want – by being overzealous sceptical and suspicious! I recall personally an incident of a taxi driver whose car had run out of petrol on the road. I was the only one who had stopped. And the few Rials I gave him – I gave more as ‘sadaka’ – alms – but the shock was on me and my sneering sarcastic staff the next day – when he brought a big plate of halwa and his farm produce – ‘because you were the only person who had stopped, trusted and helped me!

My books and my columns have many such kind of stories! Take Care!

By: Majid Al-Suleimany

 Date – September 8th 2013

Are You A VIP?

VIP
VIP A

For Sunday September 8th 2013

Between Us Only!

Are You A VIP?

A growing trend that needs to be nipped in the bud!

• Never take a person’s dignity; it is worth everything to them – and nothing to you! – Frank Barron

Believe me but I am a very respectful person – and I always greet elders to me – VIP or not – with the greatest level of respect, esteem and affection! I give them the highest level of patience, tolerance and respects that I can muster. When I greet anyone – I offer both hands in salutation and greetings – just like a kid to a grown up! I even slightly bow my head – especially if an elder is involved! That is how I was brought up in life – and I do the same pass on teachings and preaching to my children – and the grandchildren.

But I am also a give and take type of person – live and let live! The other day my granddaughter was lamenting loudly for all to hear – Grandfather always is confusing! Sometimes he has too much hair on his head- sometimes he shaves clean! This after seeing me lose all my hair! So the others laughed nervously – whilst all the time looking at me how I will react – and I was sincerely laughing the loudest! Believe me! I respect one speaking his or her mind – myself being a victim of such circumstances all around in my life. If in the old days I tried to joke this to my late grandfather, I would get slaps from different sources – and for ‘insulting grandfather’ – and yet Grandfather would still say – ‘I am not amused’!

I do not know if you have noticed it? I can make exceptions if it is a wedding – but certainly a funeral gathering is a different thing and place! It is not a place to pull rank – and or show your credentials to others in life!

One time at a wedding of a friend I was sitting near a VIP. And to start idle polite chat I asked him where he was working? And the good man – diplomatically and politely – replied at a certain Ministry. I had the guts and audacity to criticise the place. He seemed to want to know more – so I gave it to him! All the time I could see his face trying hard to hide his smirking face – and the shock was mine when I got a call few days later – I had given him my card! I was told ‘you talked to HE’ at the wedding – and I am looking at your case!

A few days later a friend casually remarked to me – Did you know whom you were talking to there then? I said No! Don’t you read the newspapers? See TV? I hope you did not say anything off point? Off point? What do you mean? I have met very high VIPS – yet they are very simple people – and conversely it is they that make you feel relaxed and comfortable! That is the beauty of Oman! A beacon of light and hope to others all around us!
The problems we have are with the second and third class Actors and Performers! A few baizas added in their dishdashas or dresses – a few job levels upwards – and they look at you with squinted eyes and with disdain and contempt! We are better than you! We are more important than you! Are you a VIP? No? So move along! Move away! Go away from me! Move!

The worst offenders are the organisers and the administrators! Actually self made! Self proclaimed! Nobody has appointed them to these positions! Like I have said before – I can accept and allow exceptions in weddings! We like it or not – that is how the cookie crumbles! You can never change human attitudes and behaviours! Either you have it – or you do not!

There is no middle ground – or exception? Or like I always like to quote – The Third Option! But for heaven’s sake – even at funeral gatherings – there is a class division? When someone has just died? The same worms will eat and devour you – whether you are rich or poor! They do not know any distinction and or difference! Food is food for them! Sorry to be morbid!

The other day I met this person. I introduced myself to him with great smiles, warmth and sincerity! First time I have ever met him vis-à-vis – face to face! I would not declassify him as not a VIP! But if you look at things some way people look at things – even poor me could be a VIP? One man’s VIP is another’s Loafer! Or lower level type of guy! If there is such a thing!

He was just polite casual – The Ahlaan (Welcome) was more polite as others at the funeral were around! There was no attempt to say more – or pull me to stay near him! Anyway, he was busy talking to someone near him – perhaps a Real VIP! I felt myself like wanting to sink into the ground – more when the Organisers – having checked the facts – realised I was No VIP – so let me go to the end of the sitting arrangement seats end! No one came to pick me to me to the centre – or to the nearby aisles! I was not VIP! So why bother?

Next time I will think twice to go to a funeral gathering especially – unless I know well the died person – and or family! When my father died – and when my mother died – I did not see any of even the sorts of VIPs I knew at the gathering – 2 or 3 sent only emails and SMS! I was not VIP! But yet at their family members’ funerals – I had cancelled everything to attend!

The East Africans say – Those who go up the ladder will have to come down! Or Be nice to the person going up – because you will meet him coming down! – East African famous!

Take Care!

By: Majid Al-Suleimany

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself!

Happiness AHappiness B

This was sent to me by a good friend. It is worth taking your time to read it. Common sense – but sometimes we need to be reminded!

****

I read this post this morning and loved it! I don’t often share the work of others on the blog but this post was definitely “share-worthy”. Creating a bucket list lifestyle encompasses treating yourself right and learning from your mistakes. This post is a great reflection of those lessons – Lesley Carter.

Is there one of these that you do often? Are there several? Let’s let the good things catch up.

Written by Mercandangel

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give
the right things a chance to catch you.

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Nothing could be closer to the truth. But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on. No, it won’t be easy. There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. That’s not how we’re made. In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.
4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. Yes, help others; but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.
11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse to confront. Making progress involves risk. Period! You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company. There’s no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you. Concentrate on beating your own records every day. Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself this: “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself! And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too. If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done. .
24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Don’t take the easy way out. Do something extraordinary.
25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out. But making one person smile CAN change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So narrow your focus.
28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years?” If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

END

Drums of War!

Syrian Gas 2

Syrian Gas 1

For Wednesday September 4th 2013

Between Us Only!

Drums of War!

To Intervene Or Not To Intervene? That is the BIG Question!

Before I start on this serious topic – I would like to say something here – as an icebreaker more – and no innuendo or pun intended!

In that distant place that I grew up – the locals used to joke and tease on a particular incident that had happened there! This burly aggressive local was confronting an Indian Shopkeeper – and the later was trying to remain ‘cool and not scared’ of the bully.

So as he was standing up to him – he told him (the bully) – If you think you are that strong and courageous – I challenge you to do this! So the bully retorted – What are you going to do to me – if I do? I will show you – the shopkeeper meekly cried out! So the bully did exactly what he was being challenged on – and which included spilling the shop’s products and contents to the floor – and breaking of one or other thing!

The shopkeeper then said and in great desperation -– If you really have guts still – then slap my wife! The bully looked like doing it – but then changed his mind! He could not bring himself to doing it –- and he then walked away from the shop! The shopkeeper turned round to the spectators shouting gleefully – See I beat him after all! I showed him! The man was so terrified of his wife – and knew ‘the Red Line’ for him – was one beating up his wife! It was only lucky for him that the bully did not want to go this far – because his fight was with the shopkeeper and not his wife!

A long time ago – in a heated and very abrasive discussion with my expatriate boss one day – he confronted me saying – You do not seem to know who is paying your salary! This is not a Trade Union meeting – you know? So I retorted – I think we are both being paid by the same source – you and I? Then he said to me – getting calmer and cooler now seeing the standoff – this is a particular situation caught with our pants down!

Before I retorted I was not wearing pants – he reading my mind – he said something absurd about dishdashas – but wanting to match his cooling down – after all we were both in HR – I said to him – I can agree with you though that we are facing Hobson’s choice here! You know what? He retorted – This Situation? – We are damned if we do – and damned if we do not!
Those words of his stuck with me for years – only to come up again only recently!

Seriously though – I have written on this same subject many times before. You can find the last one here at – Here – http://majidall.com/2012/02/12/no-more-wars-please/ – written just one year ago – and which I would suggest be read in conjunction with this one!

• I hear the sound of distant drums – Far away, far away – Distant Drums Lyrics – Jim Reeves
• The biggest casualty of war always is ‘The Truth’!
• Enough is Enough! – Prince Saud bin Faisal – KSA Foreign Minister
• The alleged poison gas attack has said killed some 1,429 people – many of them children!

At an Arab League meeting in Cairo on Sunday evening September 1st 2013 – foreign ministers passed a resolution pressing the United Nations and the global community to – Take the deterrent and necessary measures against the culprits of this crime that the Syrian regime bears responsibility for. The ministers also concluded that those responsible for the lethal chemical weapons attack should face trial just like other “war criminals.” It stopped short, anyway, of sanctioning of military intervention into Syria.

Reading the hearts, souls and minds of people all over the world – including those near at home – everyone is dead tired of going again and again into wars!

After what has happened in Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya etc – people are no longer prepared to hear more lies being fed into them!

Personally, I am still very much confused, disturbed and disoriented – because we have seen ‘live’ images of dying children in front of our very own eyes!

These tragic terrible heart breaking traumatic images must be true and real? So what is really happening here?

Who has done these despicable and terrible massacres? Crimes against humanity!

It was reported that during the Yugoslavia NATO drive against Serbs – over 30,000 civilians were killed as a result! As a result of ‘collateral damages’ – as the ‘pinpoint’ accuracy hits are just anathema! There is simply nothing like that in reality! Plus the point that nobody is talking still yet about the subsequent consequences, scenarios and repercussions of an intervention in Syria.

A survey conducted by a local newspaper (Muscat Daily of today’s date) found both residents and citizens against the intervention – because more innocent lives would be wasted away!

So what to do now?

The words of my ex boss still lingers on – You are damned if you do – and damned if you do not!

Some foot notes on the topic:-

• With utmost firmness I condemn the use of chemical weapons: I tell you that those terrible images from recent days are burned into my mind and heart, – he said. There is a judgment of God and of history upon our actions which are inescapable! Never has the use of violence brought peace in its wake. War begets war; violence begets violence – Pope Francis.
• Chemical massacre by Damascus cannot go unpunished and to gas a population constitutes a crime against humanity and it would be worse to do nothing – French Interior Minister Manuel Valls.
• The time has come to call on the world community to bear its responsibility and take the deterrent measure that puts a halt to the tragedy – Saudi Foreign Minister Saud al-Faisal.
• A “crime against humanity” and calling Syrian President Bashar al-Assad as a “thug and murderer” – USA Foreign Secretary John Kerry

May The Good Lord Bring us all back to human values, decencies – and to our senses and sanity – Amin Amen!

Take Care!

By: Majid Al-Suleimany

Date – September 2nd 2013

Words – 1009